Our
second child was conceived eleven short months later despite oral
contraceptives (oh wise college OB). We had planned to have a second child and
this would not have been a big deal except our circumstances at the time were
not ideal for welcoming another child. When
Reyna was only 3 weeks old Seth unexpectedly lost his job and was still looking
for work. We had bought our first home
only a month prior and I am a teacher meaning a January due date was not
favorable (and to be fully realistic monetary compensation in this profession
is not huge even though the job itself is highly rewarding). After the initial shock and fear of how we’d
manage, talked down by the ever level minded Seth, this pregnancy was embraced
with great joy, just as our first.
The initial
ultrasound was a bit quirky, but just that our baby looked a bit smaller than
the 8 weeks we thought he would be (reflecting with all we know now, we
probably had the right date). We had
another at the newly expected 10 week mark and it looked good. At the 20 week ultrasound we learned our baby
was a boy. We were thrilled. Kind of picturesque, at least in the new
American style, working mom, two kids, stay at home dad seeking work in the
tough economy. We could do this. Then the call no one wants to get because you aren’t supposed to get a call
about your ultrasound. Logan had a cleft
lip and possibly palate. We would need
to see a genetic counselor and go in for a more detailed 3D sonogram with a
perinatologist. The cleft lip and palate
was confirmed despite no genetic history of this or any other genetic
syndromes. Each visit we were told that
the detailed sonograms looked great otherwise and we were given hope that the
cleft lip and palate were isolated. Regardless
we intended to carry to term anyhow so on we went.
At his
birth it was immediately apparent that the cleft was not isolated. He was quickly whisked to the NICU when I
noticed his eyes weren’t opening. The
first few days were terrifying as they ran a ton of tests and specialists came
to and from often with unsettling looks of surprise or bafflement. Gradually we were able to make sense of the
variety of results. Some results were
reassuring, others were heartbreaking.
Over Logan’s 11 days in the NICU we learned that, along with the cleft,
he was born without eyes, had brain differences, along with other non life
threatening congenital defects (of which we were kindly notified were usually
indicators of additional issues that could only be determined as he developed.) Despite all this we were beyond grateful that
he was stable and we could finally take him home with us. We would later learn of other needs including
aspiration, early fusion of his fontanels and growth hormone deficiency for
which he needs daily growth hormone replacement shots until he is at least
eighteen. Although he has a collection
of separate diagnoses a specific syndrome has not yet been identified that
encompasses his various symptoms. Despite
his challenges he is beyond amazing, adored and my oh my is that boy loved.
He is our little man.
So here
we are. So much for the "ideal family", or
even the modern day ideal family, but we are so much for family.
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